Episode 67 - Which client are you? 2 types of resistance

April 17, 2024 Hayley Carr

…to achieving a goal.

Episode available 17 Apr

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Along every path toward creating or achieving something, there will at some point be invisible hurdles that keep us from moving forward. These moments of stagnation aren’t just random misfortunes but the manifestations of resistance.

So today I’m sharing with you one of the greatest secrets that I use in my coaching every single day to unblock resistance, struggle and the endless wheel spinning that can happen on our way to reaching goals and creating amazing things.

There are two types of unconscious resistance to achieving a goal.

Whether you’re coaching yourself or someone else, part of your work as the coach is to determine which type of resistance a person is experiencing so that you know how to move through it.

Resistance to Action

The first form of resistance is the most familiar one – the resistance to taking action.

This is where you know what needs to be done, but somehow, you find yourself doing everything but that’s a big sign of this type of resistance is procrastination.

You get lost in endless research or busying yourself with tasks that don’t drive your goal forward. If you’ve identified that the resistance is toward taking action, here are three things you can do:

→ Break down the task to tiny chunks
If you are overwhelmed, your tasks are too big. Break things down into very small tasks so they can be achieved in 10 minutes. All success is about taking lots of tiny little actions inside of a bigger goal.

→ Don’t do pointless mindset work
Instead of doing mindset work on the massive goal, work only on the small task at hand. Doing mindset work on one specific area. This is about finding a way to connect how taking action on one tiny task is going to give you more of everything that is important to you and less of everything that you currently don't want.

→ Accountability
If you find you're not achieving what you set out to do, you're probably setting the bar too high and you need to lower it. Allow yourself to actually experience some wins because wins breed more wins. Accountability will bring you those wins if you combine it with taking tiny actions.

Resistance to the Result

On the flip side, there's a sneakier kind of resistance – resistance to the result, or as some might call it, the fear of success. It might sound paradoxical, why would anyone fear success? Yet, this type of resistance is deeply rooted in our subconscious fears and beliefs about what achieving our goals truly means.

It embodies the fears of change, the unknown and what we might lose or sacrifice in the pursuit of our goals – even when we’re outwardly working hard to achieve them.

This type of resistance is likely when you have no hesitation toward take action and completing a task, but it feels like progress is never being made. It might feel like it's been going on forever and you're just not satisfied with the progress that you're making.

Here are three things you can do to move through this sneaky type of resistance:

→ Identify your “interesting ideas”
These are your subconscious fears and beliefs that act as barriers. Challenge these ideas one by one. Write them down and really dig deep to discover all the weird and interesting ideas you have about what success might look like.

→ Create your own unique strategy
Often people think that they need to change themselves in order to achieve new levels of success, but it’s important to identify your unique traits that got you to where you are now. It's your authenticity that makes you stand out and be able to work consistently and sustainably towards your goals.

→ Have a mission that trumps the how
Double down on teaching your nervous system that it's safe to have the result without needing to know all the things that are going to happen in between. Having a vision of where you want to go is a powerful practice and even further, allowing yourself to dream beyond your goal will make the original mountain seem like a mole hill.

As you move forward, remember that every struggle against resistance is a stepping stone toward greater self-awareness and achievement. It's about unlocking a deeper understanding of yourself and how you interact with your goals.

Everything you desire is closer than it seem – it's just about peeling back the layers of resistance that stand in your way.

HAYLEY CARR